HELP A FRIEND TO BE SAFE

Today the world fortunately has changed to the point where there is assistance for those who live in an abusive relationship. What can I do, we say to ourselves when we suspect or know that a friend male or female is unsafe in a relationship. Being a friend to him or her is your first step to be there and listen. Here are a
number of suggestions for emotional and physical safety.

- REASSURE your friend that they did not cause the beatings. A
battering partner learned to use violence as a way of
expressing anger or frustration long before meeting them.

- PHYSICAL SAFETY is the first priority. Beatings usually
get worse and more frequent as time goes on. Ignoring
a beating is dangerous. Explain this to your friend.

- Tell your friend they are NOT ALONE in their situation. Domestic
violence happens to many women and men in all income
and educational levels, all social classes, and all
religious and ethinic groups. It also happens in same
sex relationships.

- Explain to her that violence is NOT A SICKNESS; it is a
choice and a crime.

- Help your friend to make an emergency plan in advance.
For information on where to go in case of an emerency,
have them call the national hotline or a
local number.

- Your friend needs moral support. Help your friend find
the economical and physical assistance they need to live
free from assualt.

- If your friend is not ready to make the change or form
a plan, continue to BE A FRIEND. In doing so you enable
your friend to build a wall of confidence so that they
can make that decision of safety and go the opposite
way.

- If your friend is an immigrant who is sponsored by their
spouse, a hotline can refer them for legal help.


Thank you for your attention and sensitiviey to this issue. You can save a person's life by just being a friend who can ask the tough questions.